Can a Child Choose Which Parent to Live With in Maryland?

Divorce and custody battles can be emotionally intense, particularly when children are part of the equation. One of the most common questions parents ask during custody proceedings in Maryland is: Can my child choose which parent they want to live with? It’s easy to see where this question comes from. Many parents (and children) believe that once a child reaches a certain age, their wishes automatically determine the custody arrangement. However, the situation is more complex.

A Child’s Preference Matters, But It’s Not the Final Say

In Maryland, the court’s primary goal in any custody case is to serve the best interests of the child. While the child’s wishes are one of many factors the court considers, they are not the sole determinative factor. This means a child’s preference can influence a judge’s decision, but it will not override other important considerations regarding the child’s well-being. 

Additionally, there is no specific age at which a child gains the legal right to choose with which parent to live in Maryland. While a child who is 16 or older may petition the court to modify an existing custody order, this does not give the child the absolute right to decide where to live. Moreover, the court may consider the preferences of children under 16 on a case-by-case basis, taking into account their maturity and reasoning.

How Does a Child’s Preference Get Presented?

In Maryland custody cases, the child typically does not testify in open court. Instead, if the judge decides it is appropriate, they may conduct a private interview with the child, known as an in-camera interview. This is done in the judge’s chambers without the parents present, to reduce pressure on the child and encourage honest answers.

During this conversation, the judge will evaluate:

• How well the child understands the situation
• Whether the preference seems genuine or the result of parental influence
• The reasons behind the preference (for example, wanting to live with a parent because they allow more freedom may carry less weight than wanting stability or proximity to school and friends)

Best Interests of the Child Standard

Even if a child expresses a clear preference, the court must still evaluate the complete picture. As a result, Maryland courts consider numerous factors in determining custody, including, but not limited to:

• The fitness of each parent
• The child’s emotional, educational, and physical needs
• The stability of each parent’s home environment
• The relationship between the child and each parent
• Each parent’s willingness to share custody and facilitate the child’s relationship with the other parent
• Any history of abuse or neglect

In short, the child’s voice is important. But it’s just one piece of the puzzle.

Common Misconceptions

Misconception 1: My child is 12 years old. They can decide where to live.

False. While older children’s preferences may carry more weight due to presumed maturity, the judge still decides based on the child’s best interests. 

Misconception 2: If my child tells the judge they want to live with me, I’ll win custody.

Not necessarily. The court will look closely at why the child prefers one parent. Preferences based on leniency or material rewards won’t outweigh concerns about stability, safety, or nurturing.

Misconception 3: My ex coached our child to say they want to live with them.

If a judge suspects a child’s wishes are the result of parental pressure, those statements may be given little or no weight. Judges are skilled at spotting signs of manipulation during in camera interviews.

Contact an Experienced Maryland Custody Attorney Today

If you have questions about how your child’s preferences may affect your custody case or if you’re preparing for a custody hearing, contact Rice Law today for a confidential consultation. Our team is committed to protecting your rights and helping your family find solutions that truly serve your child’s best interests.